Wednesday, 9 March 2016

Blowing out someone else's candle won't make yours shine brighter.

     I love my life. And I'm not saying this to brag, but I'm really happy about where I am now. After going through some really dark and sad times, I'm proud to be happy. I'm proud to say I have parents who love me, friends who I can call family, and a boyfriend that's too amazing for words. But I have been talked down upon for reasons that I'm happy, and all I can ask myself is why. Why must people negatively speak about somebody's life if they are content with their choices? I'm far from perfect. I will admit, I have gossiped, and I have judged people on their life choices. It was only after high school when I realized how stupid it was to worry about someone else's life so much, when you have your own to take care of. Being a hypersensitive person who really feels for other people, I wanted to write something about this, being a topic I'm passionate about. I hope I can open some of my readers eyes. I'm not trying to act snobbish, or high and mighty, please just keep an open mind and really think about what I'm saying!

     I'm at that really awkward age where half of the people I know are traveling and partying, while the other half are getting engaged and having babies. Personally, I want to gain more life experience before settling down and having kids, but I also have nothing against young adults who would prefer to do the opposite. I have heard people shaming young married couples/parents my age, and when I'm asked my opinion about it, my only answer can be "it's not for me, but if that's what makes them happy then good for them". This is only one example. I've heard so many people criticize others lifestyle, people who had absolutely no relation to them. I can't think of why this is such a common thing. I don't know if it's jealousy, that some people can't have somebody else be happy because they aren't, or what. It's just upsetting to think about, and sad that there are people in this world who are so concerned about others choices, that they have to talk negatively about them.

     If you are someone who is unhappy with your situation, do something to change that, rather than ruining someone else's happiness. Trust me, it's a lot more productive. You will feel so much better about yourself if you choose to focus on your life rather than judging others. I've been judged, and I'm slowly learning that this is not because my happiness is invalid, but because I have no control over the lens in which people want to see me under. Unless you're a loved one of someone making choices you don't agree with, your opinion probably doesn't matter. If someone is bashing your decisions, they are most likely just really unhappy with their situation, and want to bring down people with them. As said in the very quotable movie, Mean Girls, "Calling somebody else fat won't make you any skinnier. Calling someone stupid doesn't make you any smarter. And ruining Regina George's life definitely didn't make me any happier. All you can do in life is try to solve the problem in front of you." Blowing out someone else's candle won't make yours shine brighter. Focus on your personal growth rather than discussing someone else's successes, mistakes, and/or choices without sympathy.

    Again, this is not me trying to boast myself up to sound like a good person. I just don't like hearing people put others down for their own choices. I think it's perfectly fine to live life the way you want to, and if anyone has something negative to say about it, they need to be reminded to mind their own business. This post might be a bit random, but it is something I'm experiencing now and thought I would talk about. There is nothing more beautiful than living life as you wish, and not having to worry about what other people think. Your happiness is valid, don't let others miseries stop you from believing that.


  1. I completely agree with you! If people would revoke from negatively judging/focusing on other peoples lives and positively focusing on their own life, the world would be a better place.

    1. It's such a simple concept, but I know so many people who are obsessed with other peoples lives!